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Issue #9 |
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Style & Substance Secrets newsletter. The resource for business professionals to improve credibility and bottom line, through image, etiquette, dining and social skills.
Tips Inside This Issue
Dear Joanne & Terry Q & A:
- Business Etiquette - Table Manners
For your free subscription to this newsletter or to forward it to a friend just click link at bottom of page.
About Style for Success
Joanne Blake & Terry Pithers can help your organization and your people improve their personal image and social skills to build crediblity and inspire stronger business relationships.
Specializing in business dress, demeanor & dining, we add enjoyable, unique, profitable content to your training, conferences, retreats and in-house seminars.
Looking for a humorous motivational speaker?
Our Dining Etiquette Video is available.
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New Fashions That Don't Work for Working Women
Help... she's a fashion victim The other day we got a call from an employer asking for image advice for his talented female manager. She's very fashionable, but when it comes to dress for her management position, she just doesn't seem to be getting it.
Unfortunately being fashionable doesn't mean she understands what fashions work for business and what fashions don't. Now he's reluctant to invite her to meetings because he's never sure how she's going to present herself and the organization.
Fashion minefield We receive 2 or 3 calls every month that echo this employer's sentiments. To be fair to business women, it's a fashion minefield out there. This season fashions are waging a battle with our brains and our credibility.
Because these styles are becoming more common, we start to assume that there's nothing wrong with the look for business. If you're striving for business credibility, it's important that you understand the psychology involved.
Our brain may not know fashion, but it knows what it likes Within seconds of meeting you, people subconsciously make snap decisions about you involving your credibility, knowledge, trustworthiness and likeability.
Most of this unconscious mental rating is influenced by outward appearance, especially your dress. In nanoseconds our brain tallies up and compares someone's image to what it intuitively recognizes as good fit, proper proportion and appropriateness.
We're accustomed to seeing certain norms of fit in clothing - such as not being too tight or conversely too baggy. The attention intuitively goes to the one detail that doesn't fit in, that subconsciously undermines the impression of success.
Three trends that just don't make the grade This season the fashion industry seems to be intentionally sabotaging women's ability to make good business and career impressions through dress. Our advice: if you wear the following looks you may be diminishing your power in the eyes of key decision makers.
1. Little girl lost - loses the promotion We often hear from young female lawyers and other professionals complaining that they are not being taken seriously in the workplace.
Analysis of their image usually reveals their dress is too youthful or teenage-like, reminding clients of their school-aged daughters. (Choice of hair style, makeup and body language often accentuate this credibility impairing impression)
This season a fashion trend is the blouse or jacket styled with short little puffy sleeves. Click here to see an example. Our brain subconsciously associates this look with little girls, so for five year olds this look is endearing. But any woman looking for credibility in a business environment should think twice about this image.
2. Short over long - shortens your credibility We're sure you've all seen the short over long look that is becoming so common. Click here to see an example.
Our brain expects that a garment that is under a top or jacket should be covered by the jacket or tucked in so the top garment covers it. This trend registers as sloppy dress to our subconscious. (Just for fun at the end of article you can see a man in this look.)
Tip about shrugs: When taken to extremes such as the shrug cardigan worn over a contrasting long top, it gets even trickier. The focal point then becomes the bust line, which is not necessarily where you want the focus in business settings.
3. Undersized - equals underachievement What's with the new style of clothing that is intentionally made to look like it is 2 sizes too small? Why pay good money to look like your clothes don't fit? This look only emphasizes size negatively.
It doesn't work for the slender woman as it makes her appear anorexic and the full figured woman looks like she's bursting at the seams. Click here to see. Clothing with ease looks richer and subconsciously makes the wearer appear more successful than clothing that is too tight.
Strike three - you're out These trends are bad enough taken individually, but this season we're often seeing them all combined in a career knockout punch. Click here to see all three trends in one.
What employers and your best friends may not tell you Most employers won't tell you when they have concerns with your dress because these issues are sensitive for them to address. So it's up to you to self-audit.
Just because a style is in fashion doesn't mean it's a good style for your success. Look around and analyze what looks are building credibility and what looks aren't. Then take a good look in the mirror, preferably a full length one.
Personal style doesn't mean just being fashionable It means selecting dress that's appropriate for your body type, your lifestyle and your career goals. With knowledge you have control over your image. You can use your clothing to ensure you are perceived the way you want to be perceived.
Guys, we don't want you to feel left out this issue. You have it a little easier than women when it comes to fashion choices for work wear. But we didn't want you to feel left out so we include a couple of links to show you how bad it could get for men if the fashion industry had its way.
Click here to see a man in the short over long trend. Looks unusual doesn't it.
Employer tip: Hosting a business image seminar is an effective way to address issues that can be sensitive. Our popular corporate team makeover is welcomed by employees as an image enhancing perk that raises the bar without jeopardizing work relationships.   Q&A - Business Etiquette, Dress & Table Manners Advice
Q. Returning Phone Calls - I find it frustrating when I leave a message with someone and they don't call me back for days. I'm left wondering if they're ignoring me or if they even received my message. What is the proper etiquette timeframe for returning phone calls?
- Coleen Yeew in Brantford
A. It's considerate to return all phone calls within 24 hours even if you don't have an answer. If you need to work on something before you can respond to the caller, the polite thing to do is to let them know how long things will take and when they might expect a response. Another tip is to under promise and over deliver. Let them know that it will take you three days to get information they need and then deliver it to them in two. This will identify you not only as responsive but also as an efficient professional.
- Joanne
Q. Slow Eater - In a recent seminar you mentioned the importance of pacing yourself so you don't eat faster than others. I wanted to ask a personal question but was a bit shy to do so. I tend to eat slowly and it's difficult for me to speed up. What do you suggest I do?
- Lait Fordinir in St. Albert
A. It is a good idea to pace yourself with other diners at your table, so if you know that you are a slow eater, one option may be to order smaller portions. Or another tip is if you notice that everyone else is done and you are lagging behind, simply give the 'finished' signal. Let the server know you're done and it's okay to remove your plate. Remember your mom isn't watching you at the table so you don't have to finish everything that's on your plate.
- Terry
P.S. If you don't know the "resting and finished signals" check out our Dining for Success Video .
A bore is a fellow talking who can change the subject back to his topic of conversation faster than you can change it back to yours. - Laurence J. Peter
The hardest job kids face today is learning good manners without seeing any.
Lord Conrad Black and Joanne in the News As the Conrad Black trial got underway, Joanne was interviewed by the Ottawa Citizen for her opinion on his dress choices for court. He appeared to be adding some friendly colours to soften his wardrobe.
While it's nice to know that dress knowledge has wide application, let's hope the rest of us don't have to use our image to gain mercy in the courts.
Back by Popular Demand The first corporate client that experienced the Corporate Team Make-Over last year, gained such great results that they invited us back to present it again for their new hires.
Women's Leadership Forum Congratulations to the organizers of the second Women's Leadership Forum in Calgary. This event just keeps growing and getting better. Joanne presented Professional Image - Power in the Blink of an Eye at their first conference and this year we had a trade show booth where we were able to reconnect with many dynamic women.
We had a booth draw for our Dining for Success DVD and congratulations to the winner Loretta Gerald. If you didn't attend this wonderful event in Calgary make sure to check out the WLF web site and plan on attending the next one.
Corporate Training with Spouses? We recently delivered a dining etiquette seminar over a meal to a company that had invited partner/spouses to join the employees. The feedback was exceptional, especially from the spouses. These dining, dress and demeanor partner sessions seem to really reinforce the training and team building.
Terry finally in the New York Times Not to be out done by Joanne, Terry was quoted in a New York Times article on conversation and networking. (It wasn't quite the bestsellers list, where he's secretly hankered to appear, but it's a start)
Foot in Mouth? Tips to help you recover from verbal faux pas Plus Business Dining and Dress Q&A
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› View archived newsletters and other valuable resources All contents Copyright ©2007, Style for Success Inc. - Terry Pithers and Joanne Blake, except where otherwise indicated. All rights reserved worldwide. Duplication or reprints only with express permission or approved credits as indicated below.
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